WARNING: Please do not ever attempt the facial suspension seen in the above photos. Even if you are experienced in flesh suspensions and working with a top-notch team. It is not recommended for anyone.

I was the official photographer for two of my friends suspensions, Mekere and Bastian for as long as possible, but at the end of the night my feet hurt. A lot. I had to tap out “early” (midnight or so) and ride back with the shuttle back to the hotel.

At this point I’m realizing we’re flying out at 8am on Monday and I had not yet found the epic bags of m&m’s that Jon had told me about, so even in my pain-filled state I decided to walk to Walmart to procure a few bags before departing.

Picked up two 42.0 oz bags of plain m&m’s (one for me, one for Jon) and a 30.0 oz bag of pretzel m&m’s for Phil to bring back home to Allie. (The bags are all the same size but I guess the pretzel in the middle makes them lighter?)  Also 3 juices, one green goodness, one berry boost and one pomegranate juice for drinking in the morning.

Flew back Monday morning, hiccup at Chicago O’Hare airport but in the end it all worked out, not ideally but at least half decently.

Sunday actually started with the “Annual Tradition” of going to IHOP for Sunday breakfast. I air-quote this, because Bastian told me it was a tradition with him and Aurora, yet Aurora had no idea this was an annual tradition.  Either way, I ended up ordering the Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘N Fruity but was not allowed to order unless I said it out loud (since I have a tendency to point)

More hanging out, literally and figuratively, I assisted in a one point suicide suspension that turned into a pull against a car (and against another guy on the other end of the car) while chasing an ear of roasted corn. My argument was if we’re chasing after food it should have at least had legs, because man did not get fat chasing after plants.

Also there was a massively huge vegan chocolate/raspberry birthday cake for Emrys which was really really good even though it was vegan.

Some definite awesome not-to-be-forgotten suspensions on this day.

More suspensions Saturday.

I think overall they were more of the simple items, while pre-rigging some of the more complicated items for the next day.

At some point Phil, Jon and I ran away with Allen & Courtney of TSD, Christine & Havve of Wings of Desire and Brent from Black Sheep Hooks for an Asian Fusion restaurant for nom’s.  It was really nice and relaxing to go for some good food and quiet, yet somewhat inappropriate conversations with close friends before all packing into Brent’s rental car back to the hotel.

Saturday the real work started up.

Actually, Saturday started with a Vinyasa yoga class lead by Mekere. Aurora, LittleJon, Emrys and I were the students of the day.

We had our official orientation, there were some classes, and some awe-inspiring suspensions.

I got to learn some things, even teach a few things, and overall helped out as much as I could.

Freaks & Fetish night is now also an annual tradition in Dallas, the kick off of the Dallas Suscon on Friday night.

Your host:

• The Headmaster, Havve Fjell (Oslo, Norway) www.painsolution.net

Performances by:

• Swing Shift Side Show (Las Vegas) www.swingshiftsideshow.com
• Mosh (Los Angeles) www.themoshroom.com
• Suspensions by: Southtownbaby

Took the 21:00 bus from the hotel to the Lizard Lounge venue while consuming my dollar menu McChicken and berry smoothie. Got to listen in on a variety of conversations all happening at the same time for the 30 minute bus ride down. Heard about an awesome hot-dog vendor that sits right outside the venue and filed that information away for later.

Arriving early means drinking early. I got into the Shinner Bock(?) beer while texting my cuddley-boo from the party. Got to watch some pretty cool performances but was definitely getting on the tired side around the 01:00 bus time so I headed out, met Bastian’s new family member Jorda and invested in a hotlink hotdog which was quite yummy.

For some reason a group of idiots decided to spray the crowd waiting for a bus with water guns, other than that we all just packed back into the bus and back to the hotel to shower and sleep off the alcohol consumption. Around 02:00 my roommate Aurora started knocking at the door and I let her in finally, trying to figure out where she was going to end up.