I SWEAR I WASN'T EVEN TRYING!!!
Alright I'm on craigslist's free section and someone posted about a messenger bag, and I'd seen it before and I thought maybe I've got a chance since it was posted about 15 minutes before I e-mailed. Well the guy who called back said it technically was taken but if I was going to drive down to pick it up in the next hour or so he'd just call the other dude back and say “hey it's gone”
So I show up. The first thing I see is a handwritten note on the door saying “This is a clothing-optional house. If nudity doesn't offend you, please come in!” Well, I knocked, because I don't just walk into people's houses, unless it's Phil. And even then I knock, and I only enter because I hear someone say “come in” or… a dog bark.
Dude is wearing a bomber jacket and jammie pants because he was just outside. I ask him if the sign on the door is legit, or just to scare away solicitors… as I'm asking… he's getting naked. So yea… it's legit. He asked if I was okay with it, which I was, whatever, it's just the human body, and then asks me if I need anything else like office supplies or anything. So we're downstairs and he has this giant box of pre-cut foam in various shapes of nothingness. One of the shapes for some reason had a hole cut out of it. And… he shoved his penis through the hole. And just walked around with this long pre-cut piece of foam hanging off his penis. And he was totally starting to get hard too.
Then we found these circle shapes, and they were pre-cut to be sort of like a ring. And… he put THAT on his penis as well.
At this point I was really fighting to keep from laughing because he totally had a raging hard-on with this circle of foam around the base of his penis… and was like “I so want to take a picture” Well we went upstairs for better lighting to take the picture. Then he grabs his digital camera and wants me to take a video. “Of what?” I'm thinking. (Really. I don't *ALWAYS* think about sex and I REALLY HAD NO CLUE what he was thinking)
Yea. I start filming. He starts jerking off.
He finished in like… under 2 minutes.
Then he washed himself, and his piece of foam, off… and I had to go to class so I grabbed my new bag & said I'd e-mail him later.
THEN… I called both A. and B. and told them. A. just laughed at me. B. replied with “How do you do it?! Even when you're not trying to pick up weird freaky guys… YOU DO!” hahaha.
Oh Craigslist 
