To be on the edge of breaking down And no one's there to save you. No you don't know what it's like. Welcome to my life

I don't plan to be all emo and angsty and PMS'y. But it happens. Thats okay though. Because even though I don't believe in karma (the do good deeds only so that good deeds will be returned to you part of it anyways) because the idea of karma is nothing but a fantasy and an ill-attempt at an effort to be able to convince yourself that anything that goes wrong in your life is anyone's fault but your own, I do believe that the attitude you carry with you, will be returned to you since obviously no one wants to be nice to you if you happen to treat them like crap. Of course, with this mindset, it's becoming easier and easier to understand why homeless people on the streets like me. It's not that I give them money all the time, 90% of the time I don't. But I do something that I know a lot of people don't do. I acknowledge their presense and help validate them as a person.

This also brings on the coolest conversations. The one-legged' guy outside the grocery store that's always around. We had a great conversation today about music. How the snowing weather is making people overall nicer, but that musicans have all become bigass sellouts by creating christmas albums before they even have a top 10 hit and how it's just to make a quick buck. Or the kid who can't be much older than me, who instantly recognizes me on the street no matter where I happen to be (around campus, 3 blocks away, etc) and always says hi to me now & asks how my day is before I can even ask how his has been going. Maybe next time I should find out what his name is.

Anyways. I'm going to have a semi-muni on my hands by about the new year. I should also have 4 of my 6 new ear piercings before the new years bash. I've also paid off my new years admission ticket. Now all I need is a living human being to make out with at the party. And dare I say, a dress??

Alright. I finally broke down and gave myself IAM access. It does kind of suck to have IAM and not want to use it because I'm just that silly. Yes. I know I'm silly. I begged and pleaded with the IAM gods to have my expirey date pushed back to its original page from the new ones we received due to the IAM blackout. Now shush! My birthday was spent writing a business plan, a psychology paper and planning a database-like project that I know nothing about. Oh, I guilt-tripped one of my friends into buying me a sub for dinner (and lunch the next day) as well. I also vaccumed my parents house in an attempt to not study.

I didn't even get a L-O-T-S going on my IM button because I received less than 25 happy birthday messages. I got so few that I replied to them all one at a time to say thanks. Instead of other cooler people who get to copy/paste everyone's name and say “thanks to these people…” so yea, I'm a loser.

Anyways, I need to go back to coding HTML with macros. See ya!

-I need to write the Human Resources & Manufacturing portions of a Business plan.
-I need to program a data asset management database, complete with a variety of assets.
-I need to write a paper (about 2000 words) on my personal-personal growth.
-I need to create a presentation on a niche market using emerging technology.

Then I need to study for my exams. Blah I tells you. BLAH!

-I need to save money to get some nutty insane piercings and other various procedures.
-I need to save money to get some kickass unicycle gear.
-I need to save money to get into the funtastic New Years party at Phil & Badur's.
-I need to save money to get a bunch of DVD boxsets I don't have for TV shows I never watched.

It's not about wants. It's about needs. And I hate people who confuse the two.

*nods* yup yup. you heard right.

chick-who-could-do-everything-but-ride-the-d***-unicycle has now offically learned to ride the d*** unicycle! don't ask me how i did it, all of a sudden my balance was right and i was moving. of course, i figured this out AFTER i said to someone “i can freemount sure. i can hop too! but i can't ride yet!” then in demonstrating how i CAN'T ride… i rode across the gym. Then i rode the length of the gym. then i was trying to do the swimming-type of turn. THEN I RODE LAPS. okay. lap. but STILL! I went an entire circle around this double gym! avoiding people & things & WALLS!

I CAN F***ING RIDE MY UNICYCLE!